A common staple of most LA clubs is the gogo dancer. Now I don't normally blog them, due to the intrinsically adult and therefore inappropriate nature of them, but I simply can't resist these from a recent trip to Ultra Suede. They are just too fun! Plus, they open themselves up to a world of captions - My Specialty! W00T!
"Put away the camera Whitey McCrackuh... These boots were made for more then walkin'."
"Bitch, I will CUT you."
"I'm so hawt, I can wear this bra-mesh thing I stole from Madonna in the 80's, and still get tips."
"OK Mebbe I'll more more cash if I take it off. Which of you bitches got 20's? Seriously, I spend thousands a week on tanning and baby oil - gallon size from Costco!"
"Nooooo I don't have an ATM, but Bambi Candi Kane over there does this trick with a credit card..."
P.S. Skull and crossbones underwear - unless you are Jack Sparrow, it just makes me think you have Herpes. And crabs. Wait, Herpes Crabs. Is that a real thing? Hold on, I gotta call Paris.
"My milkshakes bring all the boys to the yard! However, my striped Wizard of Oz socks bring all the green girls... and those munchkin fu**ers don't tip worth sh**."
"OUCH! That would be my ass, it doesn't take cash, manbitch! Just credit cards."
"I'm flexible! Don't try this at home bitches! Weeeeeeeeeeeeee"
... Yes gogo dancers use the word bitch alot. Don't ask me, I don't really speak their language.
The geek in me, however, did notice that some of them dressed like video game characters.
You think I jest? Take Mileena from Mortal Kombat:
Now take Bambi Candi Kane from Ultra Suede:
Switched at birth?
And that, ladies and gentleman, is my post on gogo dancers. Enjoy!
"Put away the camera Whitey McCrackuh... These boots were made for more then walkin'."
"Bitch, I will CUT you."
"I'm so hawt, I can wear this bra-mesh thing I stole from Madonna in the 80's, and still get tips."
"OK Mebbe I'll more more cash if I take it off. Which of you bitches got 20's? Seriously, I spend thousands a week on tanning and baby oil - gallon size from Costco!"
"Nooooo I don't have an ATM, but Bambi Candi Kane over there does this trick with a credit card..."P.S. Skull and crossbones underwear - unless you are Jack Sparrow, it just makes me think you have Herpes. And crabs. Wait, Herpes Crabs. Is that a real thing? Hold on, I gotta call Paris.
"My milkshakes bring all the boys to the yard! However, my striped Wizard of Oz socks bring all the green girls... and those munchkin fu**ers don't tip worth sh**."
"OUCH! That would be my ass, it doesn't take cash, manbitch! Just credit cards."
"I'm flexible! Don't try this at home bitches! Weeeeeeeeeeeeee"... Yes gogo dancers use the word bitch alot. Don't ask me, I don't really speak their language.
The geek in me, however, did notice that some of them dressed like video game characters.
You think I jest? Take Mileena from Mortal Kombat:
Now take Bambi Candi Kane from Ultra Suede:
Switched at birth?And that, ladies and gentleman, is my post on gogo dancers. Enjoy!
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