Thursday, July 05, 2007

Summer Fun in Oregon - Trees Now Included

Hope you all had a Happy 4th! I am doing good at home in Oregon, nice to spend time with ma and pa and do all the things Oregon has to offer, like:
Real Trees (not cell phone towers!)
Clean Air
Home cooked food
Hicks
Full Service Gas (you really can't pump your own!)
No sales tax (Helloooo iPhone?)
Running water outdoors that's not a sewer system
Living animals that are not in a zoo
The list goes on! On with the pics!

Home sweet home!

Gorgeous view! Of course it doesn't compare to my towing/wrecking company view, but you know, we can't all be so privileged.They are haying - yes I grew up around farmers. Lots of cows, farm equipment, that sort of thing. Notsomuch stores/celebs in these parts.
"What you lookin at?"
Be prepared for lots of photos of Bast... LOTS. :)
Gave her a bath today... she was not a happy camper, but she came back around!
Awww! She's such a pretty dog. Personality to match!
She folds her ears back when she's playing, it's so cute!!
She loves to put her paw on you too. Oh, and she likes to play-gnaw my hand. It's still attached, luckily. She's only PART wolf.
You want the chicken? Come get it... blanco nino. Just try.

I may be lying down, but this chicken ain't goin nowhere, pal.

She's very huggable!
Part wolf, part teddy bear.

She's also a deep thinker.
"Alpo or Pedigree tonight?"

And she hates being left alone.
You know you've been in the city too long when as you are walking down the forest every sound freaks you out. Yup, that's my freakout face, normally reserved for people wearing plaid or someone paying with a check. I got genuinely freaked out last night when playing with Bast... it was pitch black and something BIG squawked up in the trees.
Apparently there are HUGE wild turkeys roaming about. Nice, huh? They sound innocent till you see they are the size of a former child star with claws and a beak.
The lake looks gorgeous as always! No canoe rides, but a nice walk around.
So pretty! No sirens either! WOO!
WHAT IS THAT SOUND OF SILENCE?!?! Someone's stalking me for sure!
Oh that's a "Wildlife". Man, it doesn't sound quite like that on Planet Earth HD in Surround Sound.
Bast hunting skillz: 5. Woodland creature escaping skills: 0.
If you stare long enough at this bark, you can see Joan River's face pre-plastic surgery.
"More photos of me, please. Aren't I fabbbulous?"
OK what was that sound? WHAT?
Oh hahaha a deer! I thought those were extinct!
God rays FTW! I do consider myself a professional amateur photographer. lol
The air smells SO great out in my backyard!
Mom works the brown carpet @ the 2007 Shrubbery Awards - only on CMT!
Ma's got a thing for heart rocks... it's a .... mom thing, I guess.
If you look closely you can see the swarming bugs. I have a few bug bite souvenirs of course.
We created and put bridges over all the creeks over the years (In shake and bake voice) And I Heaaalped!
YO! Human! More photos of me, less trees! WTF?
I've also eaten a ton of yummy homecooked by-request food! Momz r the best.Tabouli from home ruined it from anywhere else for me.
So we went on a walk the other night, and come accross a HUGE tree in the middle of the road.
Dad: Oh yeah that's a big ass tree that 'they' just knocked down and tore through.
Mom: The bears do that y'know.
Darion: I think they have wifi at the Holiday Inn. Peace out.
"It's just a bear Darion. Sheesh."
What was that sound? It's sorta dark.... Mom? Pops?
I'M ALONE IN THE DARKNESS! SAVE ME BABY JESUS! SAVE ME TOM CRUISE!
I'M GONNA BE EATEN AND DIE BEFORE MY FIRST OSCAR PARTY! WHY GOD WHY?

Maybe if I cover myself in bear dung he will think I'm one of their own... it worked for the grizzly dude .... oh wait, he got eaten.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH I'm relatively too young-ish to perish this way!
Luckily I did survive my trek home through the darkness. This lil birdy did not, unfortch. Luckily he jumped in front of the bear and flapped his wings on the bear's eyes, providing me a chance to escape.
He even chirped "Umbrella" by Rihanna - no Jay Z tho, it was sorta cheap.
I know that sounds Disney, but that stuff happens all the time in the woods.

Especially if you ate some mushrooms.

Today we also went river rafting.... great fun! You grab floats and go upstream quite a ways, jump in the river and float through some rapids. Great fun! Here's me and Dad floating down.
Ooooh flowers and trees! Look ma, no telephone poles! Or Starbucks!

Riverbeds: Nature's Cement.
There's no place like home!
Mom and I going crazy for the cameras....
WARNING: LOOKING DIRECTLY AT MY MIDWESTERN PASTY WHITE EURO SKIN IS KNOWN TO CAUSE TEMPORARY BLINDNESS, NAUSEA, VOMITING, AND PERMANENT KIDNEY FAILURE.
Eh.... I'm skin cancer free tho!

In other Oregon news:
Dragonflies are getting busy all over the woods - mating season y'know. There's steamy hot dragonfly porn happening all over the place.
Yup, that's the kinda news you get in the woods - what creature is sleeping with what, who's pooped on the trail, what cougar is in town eating what other creatures.... actually, it's really not that different from LA.
I felt like skipping.
You survive a bear attack thanks to your friend Mr. Parakeet and you feel like skipping, OK? (Momz insists that it was something called a "Finch" but I've been to enough pet stores in the mall to know a Parakeet when I see one!)
Mom practiced her patented Feather Attack 2000 Combo Move. Sadly I'm really not joking.
Bast was quite confused and wondering if we "signed the commitment papers yet?". Oh Bast, if only it was that easy.
Mom said she was going to pose like a flower. I'm not even joking. Again. At this point, Bast just gave up and was like "Look woman, I have places to walk, creatures to bite, and butts to sniff. Can we go now?".
Sunset! I'm surprised! Yes! Sunset! no smog! WOO!
That's all I got, enough pics for ya? We are going to see my sis & bro in law tomorrow, and then Whitewater Rafting on Saturday! YEE HAW!

Peace out!

2 comments:

Waist High said...

As a full time reader in Portland, I look forward to your Oregon pictures.
Hicks?

Darion said...

Hicks.... YOU KNOW!